Christmas Wonderland Lights Display Smokies Stadium Sevierville TN

November 6, 2009 · Filed Under Sevierville Tennessee, Tennessee Smoky Mountains · Comment

Smokies Stadium, next to I-40 Exit 407, Sevierville Tennessee, will be having a drive-through lighted Christmas display from November 6th until January 2nd.

Fully computerized LED lighted displays will adorn the route along with holiday tunes. The route is nearly a mile long and lasts approximately 20 minutes. Hours are 6p.m.-10p.m. daily. Admission as follows:

$10 per car Monday -Friday, $15 Saturday and Sunday
$20 per activity van
$30 per limo
$65 per bus

Proceeds will benefit area food ministries. Call (423)652-0120 for any additional questions.

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Hillbilly Jokes & Others

The IRS audits Grandpa ! The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, ‘Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS finds that believable.’ I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,’ says Grandpa. ‘How about a demonstration?’ The auditor thinks for a moment and said, ‘Okay. Go ahead.’ Grandpa says, ‘I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.’ The auditor thinks a moment and says, ‘It’s a bet.’ Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor’s jaw drops. Grandpa says, ‘Now, I’ll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.’ Now the auditor can tell Grandpa isn’t blind, so he takes the bet. Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Grandpa’s attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous. ‘Want to go double or nothing?’ Grandpa asks ‘I’ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.’ The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there’s no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again. Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can’t make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor’s desk. The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Grandpa’s attorney moans and puts his head in his hands. ‘Are you okay?’ the auditor asks. ‘Not really,’ says the attorney. ‘This morning, when Grandpa told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and you’d be happy about it.’
Area Attractions

WonderWorks - An amusement park for the mind ! A fun and excellerating indoor Pigeon Forge attraction for all ages.
Hoot N' Holler Dinner Show - Pigeon Forge dinner show, serves up an Italian feast fit for a hungry bear while guests enjoy laughs by the bucket!
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